Beware of Those Committed to Misunderstanding You

A Biblical Call for Discernment

Beware of Those Committed to Misunderstanding You

A Biblical Call for Discernment

Relational strife often arises not from genuine confusion, but from a refusal to understand. Many people encounter individuals who, long before any word is spoken, have already decided to oppose or misconstrue whatever is said. Such people do not simply fail to listen; they deliberately shut their ears and close their minds, yet quickly insist that the resulting conflict or confusion is a communication failure on someone else’s part. The Bible addresses this reality with remarkable clarity and offers instruction for those determined to speak the truth with integrity.

The Willful Refusal to Understand

Throughout scripture, God’s messengers confront people who reject truth not for lack of clarity, but because of hardened hearts. The prophet Isaiah received a charge that defined the task before him: “Hear ye indeed, but understand not; and see ye indeed, but perceive not. Make the heart of this people fat, and make their ears heavy, and shut their eyes; lest they see with their eyes, and hear with their ears, and understand with their heart, and convert, and be healed” (Isaiah 6:9-10). The language points to a deliberate choice. The people possessed the physical faculties required for hearing and seeing, but they chose to dull their senses. They refused to understand because understanding would require repentance.

Jesus repeated the same observation about the crowds who followed Him but refused His message: “For this people’s heart is waxed gross, and their ears are dull of hearing, and their eyes they have closed; lest at any time they should see with their eyes and hear with their ears, and should understand with their heart, and should be converted, and I should heal them” (Matthew 13:15). The problem lay not with the speaker or the message, but with the will of the hearers. Many prefer to cling to their assumptions and prejudices rather than receive anything that might challenge them.

Paul met this condition in the synagogue at Antioch of Pisidia. He preached the gospel with precision, yet his words provoked jealousy and open contradiction. “But when the Jews saw the multitudes, they were filled with envy, and spake against those things which were spoken by Paul, contradicting and blaspheming. Then Paul and Barnabas waxed bold, and said, It was necessary that the word of God should first have been spoken to you: but seeing ye put it from you, and judge yourselves unworthy of everlasting life, lo, we turn to the Gentiles” (Acts 13:45-46). The rejection did not stem from confusion or ambiguity, but from envy and a settled decision to reject.

Manipulation Through Blame-Shifting

When willful misunderstanding does not achieve its intended effect, another tactic emerges: shifting the blame for conflict and misunderstanding to the one who speaks. This form of manipulation seeks to obscure the hearer’s responsibility by charging the speaker with failure to communicate.

Scripture gives clear examples of this pattern. Nehemiah endured slander and misrepresentation from Sanballat, who invented false accusations and then tried to make Nehemiah responsible for unrest in Jerusalem. Nehemiah answered directly: “There are no such things done as thou sayest, but thou feignest them out of thine own heart” (Nehemiah 6:8). Nehemiah refused to accept blame for a conflict rooted in Sanballat’s own deceitful motives.

Job encountered a similar experience with his friends, who misinterpreted his suffering and then insisted that he accept their explanation. Job responded, “How long will ye vex my soul, and break me in pieces with words? These ten times have ye reproached me: ye are not ashamed that ye make yourselves strange to me” (Job 19:2-3). His friends insisted that Job’s suffering must be punishment for hidden sin. When Job would not accept this, they accused him of stubbornness and rebellion.

Even Jesus faced such accusations. Many in His audience asked, “If thou be the Christ, tell us plainly” (John 10:24). Jesus answered, “I told you, and ye believed not: the works that I do in my Father's name, they bear witness of me” (John 10:25). Jesus had spoken and acted in perfect clarity, but His opponents were determined to reject Him. The call for further explanation was only a pretense.

The Christian’s Duty: Clarity and Discernment

God’s people are not called to manipulate or to answer every charge, but to speak and live with clarity and honesty. Jesus gave this rule: “Let your communication be, Yea, yea; Nay, nay: for whatsoever is more than these cometh of evil” (Matthew 5:37). Christians must make every effort to communicate plainly, refusing both evasive speech and unnecessary embellishment. The goal is not to win every argument, but to maintain a conscience void of offense before God and men.

Paul instructs Titus concerning those who persist in divisiveness: “A man that is an heretick after the first and second admonition reject; Knowing that he that is such is subverted, and sinneth, being condemned of himself” (Titus 3:10-11). There comes a point when continued dialogue becomes fruitless. The person who has decided to misunderstand will not be persuaded by further explanation.

Finally, the ninth commandment forbids bearing false witness (Exodus 20:16). To willfully misconstrue, twist, or assign blame where it does not belong is a violation of this law. Truth is not only a matter of accurate facts, but of honest intent and straightforward dealing.

Conclusion

Scripture reveals that many individuals will not listen because they have no desire to understand. Some choose to misunderstand and then attempt to shift the responsibility for confusion to those who speak plainly. God’s people are called to discernment, clarity, and integrity. Faithful Christians will not stoop to manipulation or self-justification, but will speak the truth in love, commit their reputation to God, and recognize when continued efforts to explain are wasted on those who have closed their hearts and minds.